I'm in my dorm room right now and I hear the local train that always runs through Tucson. Every time I hear that train it takes me back to the time that I was hanging out with my friends while they were recording their CD at Loveland recording studios. The guitarists of the band were recording while me and the singer went for a smoke and we came across these train tracks and we thought about how cool it would be to jump the train. We just sat there for awhile and then a train came. It seemed to be slowing down, so I ran up against the train until I reached the ladder. That's when I put my hand onto and carried myself up onto it. It was amazing holding on to the ladder with one hand while having the wind catch my face. It was one of the greatest moments of my life. I won't forget that. Now every time I hear that train I just reminiscence on that one moment.
I can't write enough about how much college is not for me. I don't think I have the capabilities of succeeding at this educational level. It seems that everything that I am studying has no use for me whatsoever. I keep saying I want to start my own record label but I'm loosing time by being in college. Yes there are some classes that would be beneficial such as business. The business college here is ridiculous hard to get into. It is ranked 17 in the country. Everyone I know who is in it says it is easy but it's hard to get into it. What I want to do it take these classes at the local community college and it's just hard because my parents expect a lot out of me. It's hard to due this because my brother has succeeded here because he is a graphic artist and he has the talent of being able to draw while my passion isn't musical instruments but music itself. The then that I would get most pleasure from is being able to give artists a name. Especially my friends who are great musicians. I could also try to take classes in California on music business but once again I don't have the grades to do this. So I'm stuck. I hate being stuck. That's how I feel right now. I somewhat feel depressed. The stress of college and how much I put into my classes and the results are not there.
Where is the road taking me? When will I encounter the fork in the road? When will I realize that there's something more to my life then just the signs posted in front of me?